The Mom Who's Been There

The Human Behind the Parent: When "Mom and Dad" Become People They say that when you have a child, your entire world changes.  We usually focus on the immediate shifts: the lack of sleep, the mountain of laundry, and the overwhelming, heart-stretching love for this new little person. But one of the most unexpected and quietest shifts happens when we look backward at the people who raised us. Suddenly, they aren't just "Mom and Dad" anymore. They are humans. They are people who had lives before we arrived, dreams they might have set aside, and fears they had to hide so we could feel safe. For the first time, we aren't looking up at them as authority figures who have it all figured out. We are looking across at them as fellow travelers on a very difficult, very beautiful road.  This shift changes everything about how we remember our past and how we navigate our own future as parents. The Myth of the All-Knowing Parent Growing up, our parents are like superhero...

The Relentless Smile:  Why "Good Vibes Only" Is Breaking Us (And What to Say Instead) We have all been there. You are knee deep in a messy moment. The kids are screaming, work is overwhelming, and your house looks like a bomb went off. Then someone pipes up with, "Look on the bright side!" or "It could always be worse!" While the intention is often good, the impact can be anything but. This is toxic positivity. It is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, you should maintain a positive mindset. But here is the brutal truth: sometimes things just suck. When we are constantly told to "just be positive," it invalidates our very real, very human struggles. The Pressure to Be Positive in Religious Settings This struggle is often amplified in religious communities. There is a common misconception that because we believe in God, we have to remain positive at all times. We feel like we have to put on a "Sunday best" fac...

 

Small Rituals, Not Big Resolutions:  A Gentler Way to Start 2026 We are officially a few days into the New Year. By now, the "Big Resolution" pressure is usually in full swing. We are told we need to transform our lives, overhaul our habits, and become a brand new version of ourselves overnight. But for many of us, those big resolutions feel like just another weight on our shoulders. When life is already demanding 150% of your energy, the last thing you need is a massive, daunting goal that feels like a chore. This year, I’m trying something different. I’m trading big resolutions for small rituals. I encourage you to do the same. The Problem with "Big" Resolutions are often about a distant destination. We want to reach a certain goal or master a new skill. But life is unpredictable. We get tired. Things go wrong. When we fall behind on a giant goal, we tend to give up entirely. Rituals are different. Rituals are about the rhythm of today. They aren't something y...

Finding "Me" Again:  Reclaiming Your Hobbies After Kids There is a version of you that existed before the diaper bags, the school runs, and the constant hum of a house that never sleeps. She had interests. She had things she did just because she loved them. She had hobbies. But for so many of us, especially when we are navigating travel cycles, 150% solo parenting load, SAHM life, the default parent trap, work-mom balance, those hobbies are the first things to go.  We tell ourselves we don’t have time, or we feel a weird sense of guilt for doing something that isn’t "productive" for the family. Eventually, we reach a point where we don’t even know what we like anymore. We feel a little bit flat, a little bit numb, and very much like we’ve become a supporting character in everyone else’s story. If you’ve forgotten who you are outside of being a parent, I want you to know: I’ve been there. And it is time to start reclaiming those pieces of yourself. The Identity Gap W...

The Grocery Store Spectacle:  Navigating Public Tantrums Without Losing Your Peace We’ve all been the star of a show we never auditioned for. You’re in the middle of a Target aisle or the grocery store checkout. You’re already tired. Maybe you’re mid travel cycle with your partner and your patience tank is on empty. Then, it happens. The meltdown. The arching back, the scream that hits a frequency only dogs and judgmental strangers can hear, and the sudden feeling that every eye in the building is burning a hole in your back. In that moment, it’s not just the toddler who is overwhelmed. You are, too. The Public Freeze When my kids have a public tantrum, my first instinct isn't always parenting mode. Often, it’s a freeze response . I feel my face get hot, my heart rate spike, and a sudden numbness take over. I want to disappear. But I’ve learned that the show isn't for the strangers watching. It’s a cry for help from a little person who has lost control of their big emotions. He...